Unmasking the Four Horsemen: Navigating Relationship Challenges with Suzette Halterman

Hello there! It’s Melissa, back with another episode of the Family Brand Podcast. Today, I’m pleased to introduce Suzette Halterman, a relationship and couples coach who brings a lot of wisdom to the table.

Our chat today revolves around an interesting, albeit somewhat daunting, topic – the four horsemen of the apocalypse. But don’t worry, we’re not predicting doomsday! In the world of relationships, as explained by John Gottman, these four horsemen are common pitfalls we stumble upon in our interactions.

A little about John Gottman – he’s a mathematician turned psychologist who has transformed how we understand relationships. Along with his wife, he founded the Gottman Institute, recognized worldwide for its groundbreaking research and training in relationships.

Diving into the four horsemen – criticism, defensiveness, stonewalling, and contempt, Suzette breaks down each one for us. She explains how occasional criticism is normal, but when it becomes habitual, it starts damaging the relationship and triggers other negative behaviors.

In this episode of the Family Brand Podcast, Suzette helps us understand these complex concepts and how they apply in real-life scenarios. We hope this insightful conversation helps you navigate your relationships better, fostering deeper understanding, stronger intimacy, and overall happiness.

Fun Fact: We First Met Suzette in our Family Brand community! To learn more about us or the course, follow the links below! We would love to connect and help you create your own Family Brand!

LINKS:

Website:

• familybrand.com

Social:

• Instagram: www.instagram.com/ourfamilybrand
• Facebook: www.facebook.com/FamilyBrandOfficial
• YouTube: www.youtube.com/channel/UCGu-7odB6gkPbyXpUIQLkrg
• Twitter: https://twitter.com/OurFamilyBrand

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Episode Minute By Minute:

• 0:00 What’s inside today’s episode! 
• 1:32 About Suzette Halterman and the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse 
• 3:30 How Suzette got into couples coaching
• 4:10 About The Gottman Institute 
• 8:06 Four Horsemen are a predictor of divorce
• 19:20 The goal is to be aware of the horseman and control them
• 23:48 Ownership instead of defensiveness
• 26:12 Self-soothing to deal with stonewalling
• 27:43 Creating a culture of appreciation
• 29:21 How do you make sure the positive interactions outweigh the negative?
• 31:33 These principles apply to children as well
• 33:27 How to start finding the next level in your relationship
• 34:42 Final words and how to connect with Suzette